ODE TO MRS SCOTT
Written by Gordon Higgs (Geography Teacher, Newhaven County Secondary School)
By Carol Walton
For all those who remember Mrs Scott, Senior School Mistress of Newhaven County Secondary School, the following ode was written about her by Mr Higgs, the geography teacher. Mr Higgs sent a copy to the organisers of the ‘leavers of 1961/2 reunion’ which was held in 2000.
Weeve fawt a lot of Missus Scott
Bout wot she’s got; she’s got the lot
And wots nown not by Missus Scott
Is not alot or werf a jot
And staff who’ve lived in her domain
Realise next term won’t be the same.
Sincere, inspired, gifted Mary
Very often quite contrary.
Especially when a Saltdean gent
Would seek to start an argument!
We’ll say this in her last report
That Mary Scott was quite a sport.
Hear her side-track with real agility
“Automatic availability”
Then would follow without apology
A sly old dig at child psychology
So then it would be no non sequitur
To hear the next agent provocateur.
But he’d give up because he hears
“I’ve taught all that for forty years!”
When all is said and this term’s done
Both she and we will miss this fun.
Our tribute now in all sincerity
Commends you to her versatility.
No matter what the lesson was
She’d not be at a loss because
In nearly almost each particular
A graduate – Master of Curricula.
Just see her teach without fury
Jockeying discs in her Juke Box Jury!
But whilst in class she cast her pearls
She still had time to guide the girls.
Inspired by William Wordsworth’s ode
Chastising rebel girls forebode
“Intimations of Immortality”
Or “Investigations of Immorality”?
Now could we all pass a motion
To her unfailing devotion
To extra-mural activity
“The Pageant of the Nativity”.
At games and sports it wasn’t hard
To know the Mistress of Vanguard.
On film club nights she checks all the tickets
And keeps them happy with chocolate bickets!
Many’s the outing, so the historian tells
When she nips round the coach with a packet of Kwells!
There’s many a tale could here be told
For some of them I won’t be bold;
It’s true that some spoke out of hand
We’ll not tell stories of that brand
May we now tell you without defection
That all will hold you in great affection
Again I should say with no dissension
We wish you well in spending your pension
Ending, I hope, in no adulation
Hoping you’ve paid your superannuation!